How many atheists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Why did the atheist cross the road?

March 16th, 2010
  • How many atheists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
    - Just one. He grips the lightbulb and waits for the universe to revolve around him!

    Why did the atheist cross the road?
    - To move further from God's truth!

    GOT ANY GOOD ATHEIST JOKES?


  • Didn't you just replace the word "Christian" with "atheist" in those jokes?


  • Oh good lord, I will answer this as soon as I stop laughing................................... wait, I was not looking at your "jokes" I was looking at your profile.


  • Bored are we?


  • Hey now, that's not very nice. I used to be an atheist and this only would have only pushed me away from God...who, by the way, told us again and again to love even our enemies. :)


  • LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!





    come on if you are going to insult us do it w/ creativity, intelligence

    i forgot you Christians don't have that


  • And this is representing the love of Christ how??


  • # Jesus died for our sins; ...... now let's get our money's worth.
    # Jesus walks into a hotel, puts three large nails down on the counter,
    and says, "Can you put me up for the night?"
    # So, after Pope John Paul, shouldn't the next one be Pope George Ringo?


    atheist


  • The 1st one was kinda funny.


  • I so regret stumbling into this. None of it is funny.


  • We just pray to God to screw in the lightbulb for us. Oh wait...

    How many mosquitoes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
    Only two, but I have no idea how they got in there.


  • what a good christian you are!


  • Or in the spirit of fairness, how about some christian jokes...

    Q: how many christians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
    A: none. They just stand around in the dark waiting for "the light"

    Q: Why did Jesus cross the road?
    A: Because he was nailed to the chicken

    Q:Why didn't Jesus replace the stone from the tomb when he rose from the dead?
    A: Well, he was born in a barn.

    Q: What's the difference between Jesus Christ and an oil painting?
    A: You only need one nail to hold up a picture.

    how many priests does it take to molest a child?
    if you pooled all the intelligence of all the christians together would you have enough to make an imbecile?


  • no


  • Meh.


  • Maybe I'm biased, but those weren't very funny.

    Why did the Christian cross the road?
    He was duct taped to the chicken.

    See, that's about how funny your jokes were (i.e. not at all).


  • NO, I can't do that...I have already gotten two letters from the office about my behavior this week...so I will be good!!!


  • Actually, you'll find that if you wait a few million years, the lightbulb will change by itself.

    CD


  • How do you get a one-armed Atheist out your tree?

    Wave at him!


  • Your jokes are funny, telling, and sad. I hope that God gives them ears so that they may hear.


  • Those are jokes? They arent funny at all. In fact they further the point that Christians are just silly, brainwashed, morons.


  • None. We invented a lightbulb-screwing-in machine to do it for us.







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